Sometimes, we wish our spouses would change.

If only they talked nicer, looked at things from our point of view, were more encouraging, showed more affection, spent more time with us or expressed their love for us more often…

Maybe our marriages would be different.

Sometimes, we wish our kids would change.

If only they listened to you, did their homework, finished their chores without complaining, were either a few years older or younger…

Perhaps we would be better parents.

Sometimes, we wish our bosses would change.

If only they coached us more effectively, gave us more autonomy, were more effective communicators or had a grander vision…

Maybe we would be more effective employees.

Sometimes, we wish the people we lead would change.

If only they worked harder, were more reliable, took responsibility for their development, were more enthusiastic or turned up more often…

Maybe we would be more successful leaders.

Sometimes, we wish that society as a whole would change.

If the government did their job properly, if the courts were tougher, if things were the same as they were 20 years ago, if multinationals were more ethical, if the trains ran on time…

Maybe we would be happier and life would be better.

Then we realise something important.

We can’t control the rate of change in our spouses, our kids, our bosses, our employees or in society as a whole.

Gandhi once encouraged us to, “be the change you want to see in the world.”

Who really needs to change?

There’s only one person we can change and that’s the person reading this blog.

This post was written as a guest post for my friend Laura’s site, “Change Starts at Home.”  Feel free to check out her site.

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